730 Deep Breaths

A 730 day journal- documenting the life of a woman with mental illness.

Friday was a Dud

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I spent two hours on Friday morning practicing my breathing when faced with an anxiety attack over my doctor’s appointment that day. I had to go alone due to everyone’s work schedules and for some reason I started to panic.

I haven’t left my house unaccompanied in months. 

But, I pushed myself through my worries and made it to my doctor’s just fine. Only to learn that the appointment they called to confirm the day before, had been cancelled 3 days prior. Wait, what?!

These things happen so I brushed it off and asked when I could reschedule.


She is booked solid until then. Which is not something I am happy about. I am almost out of my anxiety medication and sleeping pills. I also injured my knee and was hoping to get it checked out. As well, I really wanted to get my Psych Referral so I could begin therapy.

Now I have to wait over two months. 

So, now I am looking for another doctor. One that actually has time to see me, and one that doesn’t call to confirm appointments that they cancelled days before.

I am annoyed to say the least.

In an effort to turn this post into a positive one….

I was able to locate my records as a child from the state of Michigan. It took a little digging but we found them and they will be here in 3 weeks. My anxiety was first documented when I lived up there and I need those records to prove that my anxiety has been a lifelong condition- rather than one I made up last year in hopes of getting disability.

I must say I am rather interested in seeing what they say. Especially the records and case notes from my child psychologist. I don’t remember much about my medical history as a child, so I am interested to see what they documented.

I will share any intriguing findings with you all.

Here’s to a better Saturday!





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